💘 Disney’s Dating Profile

Name: Disney
Age: Middle-aged
Height: 80 lbs of handsome
Looking for: A long-term relationship with someone who appreciates leisurely walks, quality naps, and a gentleman with opinions.

About Me

I’m a handsome, distinguished gentleman who has left my wild youth behind. These days, I prefer sedate walks and loving pets over exhausting adventures.

I used to chase squirrels. Now I prefer to watch squirrels. From a window. While lying down. Honestly, I’ve matured.

I’m also a bit of a conversationalist. I communicate through grunts, snuffs, and my signature whisper bark. I save my full bark for important matters—like suspicious delivery trucks and squirrels who fail to respect my personal boundaries.

I’m not really a furniture guy, but give me a good window and I’ll happily keep an eye on the neighborhood. I don’t hand out kisses to just anyone, either. I like to keep those for special occasions and special people.

My Green Flags 💚

• I know sit.
• I can wait patiently for food.
• I walk politely on a leash.
• I can hang out in an unfenced yard without causing trouble.
• I’ve met a cat and respectfully ignored her.
• I’ve met a toddler, gave her a quick lick, and then calmly watched her play.
• I’m an excellent napper.
• I have strong opinions about delivery trucks.

What I’m Looking For

Someone who appreciates a big, mellow guy with a little personality.

I can get along with other dogs, although I prefer to take things slow. I do well with my female dog friend, but my relationship with my male roommate has developed into something of a competition for who gets the most human attention. I’m not saying I’m jealous... I’m just saying I believe I deserve my fair share of the pets.

A meet-and-greet would be recommended if you already have a dog. Or, if you’d rather have me all to yourself, I’m perfectly happy being your one-and-only gentleman.

Dealbreakers 🚩

• People who expect me to chase squirrels.
• Suspicious delivery trucks.
• Sharing the spotlight with another handsome gentleman.
• Anyone who thinks 80 pounds is too much dog. (I prefer to think of it as 80 pounds of love and personality.)

My Ideal Date ❤️

A nice leisurely walk.
Some quality window watching.
A few loving pets.
Maybe a snack.
Then a long nap while I contemplate the important questions in life—such as why squirrels continue to trespass.

Swipe right if you’re looking for a mature gentleman who has his priorities straight. 🐾